Photos, videos and docs of Alan Mays, with the keywords: "claws"

Oh You Lobster!

nobody@ipernity.com (Alan Mays) — Thu, 14 Jul 2016 20:22:42 +0000

Oh You Lobster!
With all your faults tell us why
Our love for you, you can't deny.

For other lobsters, see To My Valentine, A Lobster I Am and Always Will Be and Oh! You Lobster.

Squirrely Thanksgiving Greetings

nobody@ipernity.com (Alan Mays) — Mon, 23 Nov 2015 23:00:40 +0000

Alan Mays has posted:

"Thanksgiving Greetings."

A nutty Thanksgiving postcard featuring a squirrel!

Wretched Typo the Printer

nobody@ipernity.com (Alan Mays) — Mon, 09 Feb 2015 21:55:44 +0000

Alan Mays has posted:

An insulting "vinegar valentine" aimed at printers.

Printer

Lead-colored claws, tobacco-stained jaws,
Wretched Typo, you cram up your stick,
Drunk today to your sorrow, half sober tomorrow,
And then swear you're a regular "brick."
Your foreman condemns how you count up your "ems,"
How you "sub" it at half-price he likes,
But the editor only, at his desk groaning lonely,
Damns you and your interminable "strikes."

For another example of a vinegar valentine, see You Teach Each Little Elf More Than You Know Yourself.